How To Find a Counsellor

Finding a counsellor or psychotherapist can feel like a bit of a minefield. Making the decision to starting counselling can be huge in itself but then comes the onerous task of finding the right therapist for you. Even those terms I’ve just used - “Counsellor”, “Psychotherapist” - are often interchangeable and you may well ask what’s the difference? Honestly, there is a lot of overlap. People are often surprised to discover that the counselling industry is unregulated so there isn’t always a clear cut difference between one or the other. Counselling can sometimes be thought of as more time-limited or short-term, whereas psychotherapy might well mean more long-term, in-depth therapy, often connected to psychodynamic theory. Both counsellors and psychotherapists are required to undergo years of rigorous training and personal therapy in order to qualify.

Affordability is a huge factor when it comes to counselling and can also be a major barrier for a lot of people. There are ways of accessing free counselling but they can be time limited and often with long waiting lists; NHS Talking Therapies is a free self-referral service in England for anxiety and depression - this is worth exploring for short term counselling and waiting lists vary depending on your area. Many employers offer Employee Assistance Programmes (EAPs) as a benefit which may offer a free, fixed number of sessions. Similarly with health insurance you may be covered for a limited number of sessions, often with a GP referral. Charity or local low-cost counselling services can be a great place to look and some may even offer long term counselling.

If you are privately finding your own therapist then most importantly make sure they are affiliated with a governing body - BACP (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy), UKCP (UK Council for Psychotherapy), NCPS (National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society) among others - this will guarantee that the therapist has undergone sufficient professional training and is bound by the code of ethics and standards of their association. If you look at the website for any of these governing bodies they will have a register of therapists that you can search through. There are also other platforms such as Counselling Directorythat require the counsellors they list to be affiliated with a governing body.

Most counsellors and psychotherapists will offer an (often free of charge) initial consultation or phone call - take advantage of this and ask questions about the way they work; ahead of the call have a think about what you want to know. 

It goes without saying that different counsellors work in different ways depending on their training and theoretical approach. This in itself can feel overwhelming and unfamiliar so I’ll outline some of them below:

CBT - “Cognitive Behavioural Therapy” is very popular within the NHS. It is a time-limited, solution focussed approach to therapy dealing with present life issues. It focuses on changing unhelpful patterns of thinking and behaviours, often using practical tools and homework between sessions.

Psychodynamic - explores how unconscious processes and past experiences shape current feelings, behaviours and patterns. Often lends itself more to longer term work with emphasis on the relationship between the client and the therapist.

Person-Centred - a form of Humanistic counselling developed by Carl Rogers who believed that clients are the experts in their own lives who will ultimately find their own answers. The therapist offers unconditional positive regard, empathy and congruence to facilitate the client’s agenda. 

Gestalt - focuses on present-moment awareness and the “whole person” (thoughts, feelings, body, environment) often using experiential techniques like role play or the “empty chair”.

Integrative - not a single model but a deliberate blend of approaches tailored to the needs of the client.

Whether or not you are new to therapy you will bring your own assumptions of what counselling is like. My own vision of what therapy might look like (before training and my own personal therapy) might sound familiar as it’s how it was often depicted in movies. The “therapist’s couch” with the “patient” lying back talking to a serious looking man in glasses, furiously taking notes, often sitting out of the line of sight of the patient. Most modern therapy has moved away from this popular image, although it may still have its place in psychoanalysis. I don’t have a couch in my therapy room! 

What was rarely depicted in the movies and what I believe now is that each therapeutic experience is completely individual as it is informed by the therapeutic relationship between the client and the counsellor. Together you build something unique that will be different from any other client/therapist relationship. Because of this, it is worth taking your time to find a counsellor that feels like the right fit for you.